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Hamilton Wins National Best Drivers Award 🥇
Are Hamilton Drivers really all that bad, and if so, how could they win an award?!

Jeff Goldman
Jan 23, 20202 min read


Pot Holes demand equal rights. “We have the right to live!” - Mr. Poptire
The recent Fix our Streets campaign has stirred quite the debate in Hamilton. Some encourage voters to vote yes on taxing themselves more...

Jeff Goldman
Jan 11, 20202 min read


Red Lobster Opens 3 New Locations In Hamilton!
...one will be located in a food truck down by the river, so that they can substitute lobsters for craw dads.

Jeff Goldman
Jan 2, 20201 min read


Mysterious “Boom” discovered to be the Ghost of Alexander Hamilton!
They decided to settle it with a duel! I imagine the Gun Smoke theme was playing in the background! Anyways, Burr shot Hamilton, while Hamil

Jeff Goldman
Dec 26, 20192 min read


Internet provider admits they didn’t know Hamilton Existed.
“We kept getting hate mail from these people in Hamilton, Ohio. We thought they were just very persistent scammers so we ignored them...

Jeff Goldman
Dec 19, 20191 min read


Does Hamilton have an A.S. ULTRA?!
“Of course you love our blueberry muffins, you’ll ALWAYS love our blueberry muffins!”

Jeff Goldman
Dec 5, 20191 min read


Hamiltonians TERRIFIED of giant circles!
City officials ensured round abouts are significantly safer than traditional intersections ...Spherephobia... increased accidents by 974%.

Jeff Goldman
Nov 29, 20191 min read


Local School to start new Clean Room Test in 2020
2020 will be the start of many new policies for local schools. Many being about security, but there’s one policy many parents seem to...

Jeff Goldman
Nov 20, 20191 min read


Local kids Protest the Dad Tax, put an end Trick 'r Treating.
Every year kids around the world on Halloween, are subject to pay the “Dad Tax”. The “Dad Tax” also known as the “Mom Tax”, are the dues...

Jeff Goldman
Oct 31, 20191 min read


Modern art, or parking meters?
Last week residents from downtown Hamilton noticed some new sculptures scattered around downtown. Turns out, they are not actually...

Jeff Goldman
Oct 18, 20191 min read


Hamilton man finds princess bike, assumes it’s his.
“He looks just like a pretty princess.”

Jeff Goldman
Oct 11, 20191 min read
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